The Triton 3300-6 will take you and 5 of your fellow pirates to a depth of 1000m in luxury. It doesn’t come with torpedo tubes but I’m sure you could mount a spear gun on it. It goes deep enough you can hunt a colossal squid, just make sure it doesn’t hunt you.
If you’ve always wanted to be inside a shark (But not in a sexual way) Then this personal submarine is just what you need. It’ll do 55mph on the surface and a little less when you dive. But you can make it jump right out of the water. This thing is way more savage than any pussy ass jetski. The perfect gift for the pirate who has everything.
Bruce Lee famously said be like water. But that was then, now you can be like a shark instead.