Is it a hat, is it a knife? It’s fucking both. Never be without a knife when you’re feeling stabby again. The Bill Blade is a kit that quickly ruins your favorite hat by attaching a knife to it. The perfect gift for the pirate who has everything.
The Triton 3300-6 will take you and 5 of your fellow pirates to a depth of 1000m in luxury. It doesn’t come with torpedo tubes but I’m sure you could mount a spear gun on it. It goes deep enough you can hunt a colossal squid, just make sure it doesn’t hunt you.
When shit hits the fan and you need to head for the hills you’ll be glad you’ve got this US Army issue Rucksack. It’ll carry up to 120 pounds, and is designed to last a lifetime. It’s seriously heavy duty. Perfect for carrying large amounts of ammunition deep into the wilderness.
When the apocalypse happens don’t get caught without the correct pants. These combat trousers from Crye Precision are best pants for any kind of societal breakdown. They’re also pretty good for hunting.
Because quite frankly barbed wire is for pussies. If you’re serious about keeping people out of your bunker then you’re gonna need rolls and rolls of this razory goodness. Not effective against virus crazed loons or zombies.
Perfect for pirates and ninjas alike. These superbly balanced blades make a great present for young children ,as the have extra sharp edges and are absolutely lethal.
The serial killers best friend, do the deed and bury the evidence with versatile tool. Capable of cutting down a tree or a swarm of zombies. The zune camping shovel can even dig a hole. Perfect for snowmobilers, hikers, and psychopaths.
Sharp enough to shave with, beautiful enough to sleep with. This tomahawk is a woodsman’s wet dream. You’ll want to chop some shit up.
There’s a lot of ATV’s that pretend to do what the Sherp actually does. You can drive this thing from Cape Horn to the North Pole. Nothing can stop it, not ice, water, snow or mud. This beast is unstoppable. It holds 8 adults and has a matching trailer unit for serious expeditions. It’s also great for doing the school run.
The Frontier Scout 8×8 can go pretty much anywhere you want to go. It’s amphibious, and will plow it’s way through pretty deep mud, and over just about anything. Haul your gear to your favorite campsite deep in the backwoods.